Wanting something so bad you can taste it!

I recently joined the Gender Equality movement known as HeForShe, they encourage you to start a movement in your city. Their purpose is to unite Men and Boys to raise their voices for the equality of woman, and an all around equality of all genders. This hit me, like nothing as before, I don't know why it just did. So I started working on getting a chapter started in west Michigan thinking it would be easy to get people involved in such a common and urgent issue such as Gender Equality. i found very quickly that it is not easy, and that people did not jump to join the cause. At fist it made me very angry! I was upset that people weren't taking me seriously. If you don't know me, I've never been the most follow through kind of person. After the anger subsided I decided that I wouldn't quit, I'm going to soldier on to make HeForShe of West Michigan happen even if i have to stand out in the cold alone with a sign, I will get my view across no matter what people think of me, or don't. 

I just want to make a difference, and one of my very wise friends told me that even if I get one man to support the cause I've done something, because the rickashay effect of that one man to another and another will matter. I will not give up planning the Informational Woman's Bazaar at GVSU, and I will not stop planning the Fundraising Gala even if only 3 people show up. I stupidly thought that people would want to donate their time and or money to the campaign, what I did find out is I need to try harder so that i am taken seriously. .

He For She Campaign!!!

HI!  I am a man, I am a stay at home parent, i am the proud parent of a beautiful little girl Joplyn. I want the world she grows up in to be equal, I want her to have the same advantages as her male counterparts. With this want, i decided to join the campaign He For She, their soul purpose is to get more Men and Boys involved in the Gender Equality of Women. Women are strong emotionally driven powerhouses, they bare life, and they have every single right to have the same advantages as men do. So I implore and Challenge Men and Boys to go to HeforShe.org and sign up to be apart of this movement. It doesn’t cost anything but 5 seconds of your time.

The HeForShe Commitment

Gender equality is not only a women’s issue, it is a human rights issue that requires my participation. I commit to take action against all forms of violence and discrimination faced by women and girls.

This is something I am very passionate about and even if I only reach one male, who then passes it on to another, and so on and so forth, Ill feel I’ve made an impact. So please take a min out of your day and spread the word to at least one male and a difference will have been made!

Also Share your Stories of Gender Inequality, what happened? How did you overcome it? Are you a Parent? Did you treat your children the same? If not why? Are you a man who has stuck up for woman who have been victims of Gender Inequality or violence etc. 

Also join the HeforShe challenge and take a Selfie of yourself with a HeForShe sign and post it on Facebook or Twitter with the hashtag #Impact10x10x10 and #HeforShe, You can also follow heforshe as well as Their Global Goodwill Ambassador Emma Watson. You can also find me on Twitter and Facebook

twitter.com/miahdior

facebook.com/miah.dior 

To Be Continued

I am Ready
i am ready
i am...

Stuck in a forest of my own making,
covered in someone else skin
revolted by the balance of time
the cruel injustice of it all

I am not this person! Loveless and Shamed, struggling to be a person, struggling to take a breath of fresh air. losing time, undernourished of love, the sweet sexy smell of love but a dream. a place i used to visit fondly, now just a flicker of the T.V. screen.


I am Drowning
i am drowning
i am...

Sometimes...

In the meanwhile's of yesterdays I try
I try to be that person with substance


You would never know how hard it is for me looking at me. I keep that smile to fool the foolish. Inside my mind Im wondering around undergoing change after change. For a long long time I was a Star in my own right. I graced the stage with raw emotions, a therapeutic mind massage. A whole other human being living within me. She was gorgeous and broken in the same ways as i was, but she knew how to let it out. Once I killed her that all went away, cold turkey, withdrawing from the stage.  I had no release for the circus of my mind. Some days banging my head on the bars of insanity. Only my child keeps me from it. I have to stay strong for her. I cant allow her to go through the childhood hell I did. Being a parent isn't enough, I never want to crush any dream she has, or wants to aspire to. I will support her, I will steal for her if I have to to make those dreams come true, because money I am not made of, and never will be, but dreams are still able to be fulfilled without it, or else it will be. The things that life throws at you, are bullshit at times. Makes you look up and say "What the Fuck?" Im not a religious person by any means. I believe there is a puppet master somewhere guiding us to their  own amusement whether its God or Buddha. Talking to the sky is the only thing we have, hoping someone or something is on your channel at that point. I digress,  writing has brought back a new way of releasing my inner battles, I lost writing for awhile and am thankful it came back to me like an old friend.  More to come, thanks for reading (I hope someone is) xoxo *m* 

A Case Of You...

The sunset was blood red, the sweet color of a good bottle of Merlot. I sat in our place under the whispering willow tree by the lake. I sat waiting for you, we met here as children. The first time we saw each other in the raw. Two translucent bodies exposed. Skinny dipping on a misty hot night. Nothing torrid, just innocence and giggles. 
Then as we got older the innocence was gone and the sexuality of life hit us like androids in space. We were consumed by each other on the shores of the lake drinking each other. Then life began in opposite directions, leaving us starved for love. So you asked me to meet you at our spot, and together we would be as one again. My toes in the water, remembering the nights we were love. In our own universe, but you never came. You left me that day, with no goodbye, you were tore from me like a scab and I was left with nothing but the case's of you to drink for the rest of my life. 

Music's Strong Hold...

Music moves many souls. It's poetry, its melody, everything about it. The way an artist can pack a whole life of emotion into one song. It goes for a genres of music. The simplest of Love songs can transcend forever into the universe and continue to move souls beyond time. Even the wrenching heartache of a song of lost love, or a song that fills you with happiness! Music is life! Whether your listening to Janis Joplin or Marilyn Manson to Blues Traveler, I relate to so many facets of music, from Hard metal to Bluegrass. Yes, i know your like we know who cares next blog please! But I was just feeling musically sentimental today, I realized how many songs by how many artists have saved me or encouraged me. Its a list of never-ending musicality. It made me think that I might make myself a writing challenge and take one song a month, and dissect it, or write a short story to it. Its my way of showing appreciation to the music and artists and writers, who bring us such beautiful soundtracks to our lives! My first pick will be my favorite song of all time which is A Case Of You by Joni Mitchell and I will write a short story to it and see how it goes! Stay Tuned! Ill have it ready for you tomorrow.  xoxo *m* 

Um...I dont like that much

Try just try and tell me that when your spouse gives you a High Five because you made money massaging two men and gave them a Happy Ending! Im pretty sure your marriage is loveless and now has become a high fiving friendship sorority brothers type shit. How do you continue to look at this person seriously, and sexually?  Not that the sex has been plentiful or even good in a long long while, well since the child has been born. Not that you would trade having a child for the chance at having good sex? Would you?  At this point in my life I would settle for a quiet day, all by myself, with music, writing and warm cup of coffee. Marriage is a triad of problems, and it takes two hell of a pair of people to make it last. I mean like your great grandma and grandpa last. Johnny and June last. 

Are you married? if so would, and your spouse died , would you die 4 days later because you couldn't stand a life without them or would you finally feel free?  These are the questions people should be asking themselves before the delve into a  crying baby, 9-5, no sex having life! You better make damn sure your ready to look at the same face for the rest of your life, even as it falls and gets wrinkly and old. 

In the days of battle over the sanctity of marriage. Why would you fight for it? What does it even mean anymore? I feel the gay community just wants to get married because they cant. Marriage doesn't mean what it used to anymore, so why battle for something that just stands for two people doing something on a whim or because your pregnant and you actually still think marriage is something you have to do?  

Again this is all the opinion of a Gay man married to a Female to Male Transsexual, who had a child and got married and now live in the same house but more then often ignore each other unless there is another person other then us in the room. No sex life, No Social Life etc.  My judgement on marriage could be clouded but no less true for most married couples in the world.

A snippet of my book I'm working on...

She was walking down the tunnel. The frozen drops of liquid startling her at every drop. Her eyes adjusting to the darkness, she could only make out slight shadows and tiny plays of light poking out of the walls. She couldn't remember how she got here or where she was going. Whispers were echoing through the tunnel. She couldn't quite make out what they were saying, except her name was apart of it. So she journeyed on toward her name. The cold water beneath her feet was seeping into her boots. She was shivering from the cold. She could see the flickering of light ahead and shadows moving within it. Her heart was pounding in her chest. The closer she got to the flickering shadowy room she could hear faint hums like chanting.

               The cloaked figures were circled around something, all of them chanting incoherent words and weaving back and forth. Karolyn was glued to the spot, she didn't understand what was going on, and why was she here? Was she dreaming? And if she was why could she feel the cold and fear so vividly. Out of the shadowy darkness came the cries of a baby. Karolyn was startled with fear. She realized the cries were coming from within the circle of shadowy figures. 

and the reflections...

It must be the weather, or maybe the music. I feel reflections of a life i once lived harrowing my vision and mind. Reflections of the things I've lost and loved. It leaves a pit in your heart, it even hurts. People, they come and go. nothing is forever, not even life, and that sometimes hits you and you cant help but hurt for it. I wanna have the times back, the laughing, the adventures, the pure moments of friendship and love. Its a stalemate, everything is gone you once held so dear and your in this new life, alone. Only my beautiful baby girl to light the days. She does that, the dark days of most, her smile brings me back to reality. 

 It doesn't take away the hurt though, it mutes it for another time. I day dream often, and have been in a time machine and gone back to times were we lived! we Loved! we caused trouble and mischief. Kissing, Hugging, Skirts, Manson, Drugs, Drinking. I don't feel bad for missing some of the bad things, they taught me things. Then Im back to reality. My child smiling at me, dancing around to music, singing into her microphone. Saying I love you, by just saying YOU in the most beautiful way. Old times good times have been here and gone, and its not bad to feel a bit of sorrow that they are gone. You gotta look ahead and think of where you want to go from there. Is everything what you want it to be?, are there changes to be made?  Usually the answer is no, and that means its time for a change. Because there is too many things I wanna do, and not enough time to do them. I appreciate and love all those people that have helped me grow, the people who loved me for me, the people that loved fiercely with me! Most gone, for some reason or another. Everything and everyone usually goes on, and your not always a part of their change. But this bird you cannot change because ill always be Miah, ALWAYS. A little different,some growth, but ill always be me! and i guess that's something i can always count on.

Relevance...

postmortem and time after time

casting a believable smile

feeling of dirt and grime

and failing to be agile, then the rhyme is even poor and less then. When your life is of a certain age and your standing at that stupid fucking crossroad right or left? I'm going down the fucking center through the bramble and the brush. Like I always do, always take the hard road, never a dainty walk to the next moments or divisions of life. Im a reluctant rhino, bashing through the forest not seeing what was ahead of me, finally being stuck in the mud of my own making, muck of the most terrifying kind.

Your left separate and unknowing, and your left with a life you don't recognize, peering at yourself through the looking glass and trying to get your attention "Hey! YOU! Wake up! Something Wrong! even though you realize it you realize it too late... 

Ranting...

I am super irritated with the entertainment industry right now! All these reality T.V. shows about celebrities and their fabulous lives. If i have to see one more fucking Kardashian (which i watch) get famous I'm going to hang myself. Why Why Why do we have to be subjected and mesmerized by it? If there has to be reality T.V. why not actual human beings who live and struggle? Keeping up with Poverty or something? I invest my time watching all these celebrities and find myself bitter and jealous that i cant just go shopping or on the drop of  a hat go on vacation, and I know it isn't anyone's fault but my own i chose to do what I do, but why cant regular people be publicized? or followed? Honey Boo Boo does not count! (have never watched btw) I look at my child everyday and I sometimes am sad that she wont be one of those "amazing" people, I hope she will, but with a semblance of pride. She sings and dances to Lady Gaga footage and videos and i find my self entranced by her veracity and she is 2 and just knows she loves what she sees. Its an irrational feeling to be jealous of the things you cant have, but it is a natural feeling for most people, and the entertainment community has done that to us. Im not buying into any subliminal messaging theories at all, but every reality show is shoved in our faces with Fights and Glamour and intrigue and Damn it! It makes me sad. What happened to the arts? Singing and Dancing competitions, Shark Tank etc, they even have shows that tell people they aren't good at something they love! Thank God they haven't dove into the writing community, that would be ruined as well. I'm a very entertainment oriented person, I admit that! I watch and do all the things i Bitch about! at least I'm truthful! I guess all this boils down to my feelings that people should do what they LOVE whether they are good at it or not! You don't need a celebrity to tell you whether or not your good at it! Thanks xoxo *M*

A Day Dream I had Yesterday...

In a world that is so self provoked by fame and fortune there was one little girl who couldn't take it anymore. She felt like she was trapped in a world full of false driven ideals and hopes. Hopes that would stay unfulfilled and ideals that were so unrealistic they left invisible negative footprints all around. The people of the world had become so obsessed with being the next Kardashian or the next Honey Boo Boo’s that the very fundamentals of what was once held dear was nothing but Facebook Status’s and Blogs about Kardashian’s.  Julia Hanover sat in her bedroom and wished upon a falling star that she could change it somehow. After that she started to write in her journal, she was writing how much she hated reality T.V. and how she wished it would be canceled. No sooner did she write it then there was a scream from her older sister’s room. She stood up and went running into her sisters room expecting the worst, but what she ran in on wasn't what she had expected. Her sister was on her bedroom floor in tears screaming. Julia looked at the T.V. she was pointing at, the news bulletin read: All Reality T.V. Programming has been canceled pending a Supreme Court hearing about its authenticity and moral integrity. Julia couldn't do anything but smile. 

                                                                                Photo Provided by, wallpaperno.com

An Introduction...

Hello!

My name is Miah! I am first and foremost a Parent, everything else comes after. She is a beautiful 2 year old little girl named Joplyn and was born Oct 31 2012 to my great and utter excitement. Being someone who NEVER wanted children once it happened I wouldn't have it any other way! I am also married to an F to M Tran sexual MAN named Brandon. I am 34. I am a retired Female Impersonator, that is something I did for 14 years of my life! In some ways it hindered me and in others it was very freeing and creative, it was my way of writing for a LONG time. I have recently come back to my LOVE of writing. It is something I have done, and had passion for at a very young age whether it be short stories or poetry. I am currently working on a few larger projects as well. I thought that blogging would be a good facet for creativity in the writing process. So! Here I am, ready to start this journey and share it with others. This blog will contain many many things! Life, Writing, Opinions, Rants etc. So I hope you bare with me, and I hope you enjoy what you see and if you don't feel free to say so, I may or may not agree, but I'm the type of person who loves ALL criticism. xoxoxo